Friday, July 08, 2005

An Al-Qaida Meeting

The scene is a small room somewhere in the Middle East, probably Iraq or Afghanistan. There is a bank of television screens almost covering one wall, with news programs from all over the world showing on every screen. Achmed Hassan is monitoring the world news broadcasts as Abdul Mohammed enters.

Abdul: All praise Allah, and Mohammed, his prophet, what is the news today, my brother?

Achmed: Allah be praised, Our holy Jihadist brothers in England have scored a great victory for Allah and our leader, Osama.

Abdul: Praise Allah, that is good news indeed. How many of the infidel dogs have we purified this day?

Achmed: the count is still not final, but it is close to 50 so far. With Allah's help it is hopeful the numbers will go over 100, Allah be praised.

Abdul: Yes, Praise Allah. And how is the propaganda effort going in the Nation of the infidels? Are the Government leaders there still fighting among themselves?

Achmed: Yes, Allah in his infinite wisdom has planted the seeds of insurrection into the liberal wing of the party of the Democrats. The infidels, Durbin, Kennedy, Reid, Biden, Pelosi, Dean, Byrd, and the others are fulfilling their destiny and Allah is pleased.

Abdul: Then they are succeeding in setting the Infidels of their Nation against each other?

Achmed: Praise be to Allah, Their speeches, wherein they blame their own leader for our purification procedures are strengthening our resolve, and has been a source of great encouragement for our soldiers of Allah.

Abdul: Perhaps, by Allah's great wisdom, he will prevail upon them to convert. They would be mighty warriors for our cause.

Achmed: Alas, Allah has said that those who turn against their own people and join with their enemies cannot be trusted. We have the Americans on their knees now, and when we are victorious, and Bush is defeated, we will kill them, as Allah has commanded. No infidel can be permitted to live, Praise Allah!

Abdul: But what of Bush? He has been unwavering.

Achmed: True, he has indeed been the hindrance to Allah's success, the one reason we have not already won this great Jihad against the Great Satan. But we have hope that the Democrats will win the majority in the next election and then our victory will come to fruition, by Allah's grace.

Abdul: That is Allah's will. How can we lose?

Abdul and Achmed together: All praise to Allah, and to Mohammed, the only true prophet of Allah!

The preceding scenario is, of course, fiction. A figment of your humble, uneducated, friend and narrator's twisted imagination.

Or is it?


rich bachelor said...

Oh, good lord. Mark, you strike me as being a smart man. Engaging in this sort of thing makes you look like the sort of thing people in later decades will point to as evidence that we were a bunch of xenophobic fools in this time period.
Just as history may very well prove me wrong that this was the action of persons highly placed in our own government who wanted England's populace to be more stern in their resolve to back our weirdness abroad, currently.
Everyone? Please note that I'm admitting that I might be wrong. This may very well be the work of a bunch of Arabs who misquote the Quran (check my comments, last post), since they're a little tired of having no usable roads, sewage systems, water supply, pharmaceuticals, etc. I'm willing to admit that.I can see where that might make people mad.

Mark said...

Oh good Lord, indeed. This is merely a fanciful look into what could possibly be in the minds of some of our enemies. How can I, or anyone, know what goes on inside the minds of murderers? Maybe this is exactly how they see the protestations of the Bush detrators in our country. Maybe it isn't even close.
But it is a fact that Al-Jezeera has picked up the comments made by these politicians and used them to encourage their cellmates. I have not said that the Bush haters have helped them intentionally, in fact, I'm sure they have the best interest of the country at heart. Well, at least they have the best interests of themselves at heart. And that isn't necessarily a bad thing, is it?

Erudite Redneck said...

Oh, good Lord, again. If y'all on the hard right can't identify yerselves as much other than "not Democrat" you don't have much to stand on, do y'all. Once again, my party has been depicted as the enemy of this nation. It is majorly offensive and just flat wrong. Ann Coulter would be proud -- and if that's a compliment, that says a whole bunch.

Mark said...

ER, I said this is fanciful. The comments made about Democrats were made by my protagonists, in my attempt to suggest what the terrorists might be thinking. Remember, they may see no distiction between Democrats and Liberals as I do.
Even many Democrats themselves have trouble with that distiction. Look at the reaction to Karl Roves comments about liberals, that some Democrats had. As I'm sure you have read ad nauseum, as I have, he said nothing about Democrats. he was talking about liberals.
I am sorry that i offended you and other Democrats that are not necessarily liberal. It was not my intent.

Francis Lynn said...

I think Mark has an actual transcript from Al-Jazeera tv & not just a fanciful construction from his mind. It sounds too true, too expected from the likes of some mentally unbalanced Mulsims to be fiction. This is exactly how the fanatic pigs think. As for the Dem leadership & the wacked out libs, their nasty, spiteful rhetoric & bad-mouthing of the President & the war effort are certainly worth the price of some bullets to the Isalmic terrorists.

Erudite Redneck said...

Hey, this was thought-provoking, I'll give ya that.

rich bachelor said...

Or just bile-provoking. Whatever.