Sunday, July 24, 2005

101 Things About Me

) I was born in Kansas City, Missouri
2) I am the youngest of my parents 6 kids
3) I was raised in Wichita, KS
4) I love chocolate
5) I have type 2 Diabetes
6) I cheat on my diet
7) I don't like stupid people
8) I don't like rude people
9) I've been married twice
10) Both my ex-wives are crazy. Really
11) My oldest kid is mildly retarded
12) I have 3 grandchildren. 2 boys and 1 girl
13) One grandson died a day after birth
14) I have 4 natural kids and one adopted. 4 boys and 1 girl
15) My adopted boy was in jail the last I heard
16) I came within one round of being on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?"
17) I have a need for everyone to like me
18) I like suspense thrillers
19) I have read everything Kurt Vonnegut ever wrote
20) I don't think I have ever experienced true love
21) I listen to NPR on Saturdays
22) When I was a kid I shoplifted a pocketful of bubblegum and got caught
23) I drive a 2005 Dodge Neon
24) I'm the dumbest of my siblings
25) I used to be a telemarketing manager
26) I moved to Maryland for a woman
27) I am a Christian, but I'm not religious
28) I am overweight
29) I think poetry has to rhyme
30) I spend way too much time on the computer
31) I make many stupid mistakes
32) I can't keep a good job
33) I look younger than I am
34) I live in a one room apartment
35) I have a pug named Beast
36) I am a very bad liar
37) I drink nothing but Diet Mountain Dew
38) I used to like mustard. I don't anymore
39) I am frugal
40) I wear boxers
41) I have visited 26 different states
42) I have been on a cruise in the Caribbean
43) I lost $26.00 to a carnival con man once
44) I caught an 8½ foot sailfish off the coast of Mexico
45) I smoked crack once
46) I spent 4 hours in jail once
47) I once drove from South Padre Island in Texas to Kansas city without stopping for rest
48) I marched in a peace march in college
49) I saved the life of a woman who was overcome by carbon monoxide
50) I have hair on my back
51) I hated taking care of my sick grandmother
52) My eyesight is so bad it kept me put of the armed forces
53) I hate onions
54) I am a mommas boy
55) I think tattoos are gross
56) I drive too fast
57) I didn't cry when my father died
58) I cried at his memorial service
59) I suspect I am getting senile
60) I am a failure
61) I am intelligent
62) homosexuals disgust me. Both sexes
63) I can be insensitive
64) I like bad puns
65) I like Greenday
66) I am of Scottish heritage
67) I have ugly feet
68) I have a large vocabulary
69) I am a horrible housekeeper
70) I have a concrete sequential personality
71) My 8th grade English teacher told me I had the 2nd highest IQ in the school
72) I consider myself a bad father
73) It annoys me when I see people park in handicapped parking spaces and they aren't handicapped
74) I have never been beaten at Trivial Pursuit
75) I didn't cry when my grandson died
76) I rarely see or talk to anyone in my family
77) I am my own worst critic
78) I have a great sense of humor
79) I live with bad luck
80) I have had over 40 jobs in my life
81) I choked my wife in my sleep once
82) I usually don't remember my dreams
83) I never give money to beggars
84) I am proud of my integrity
85) My favorite movie is Cyrano De Bergerac
86) I am an expert at barbeque
87) My credit sucks
88) I have an irrational fear of suffocation
89) I was pretty good football player
90) I have too much pride
91) I am a techno-moron
92) I try to find something to respect about everyone
93) I have the spiritual gift of discernment
94) I have one secret I'll never tell anyone
95) I always had a crush on Marilyn Monroe
96) I turned down the lead role in my elementary schools production of "Little Black Sambo"
98) I dropped out of college
99) I once caught a burglar in my house
100) I caught the guy that stole my wife's car
101) I know I left some better things off this list


tugboatcapn said...

Great post, mark.
I know that some of those were hard to type into your computer, but at least you are at peace with your mistakes as well as proud of your triumphs.
I personally am way too narcissistic to ever write a post like this.

Poison Pero said...

Come on Mark, tell us.........

Mark said...

Pero, I'll answer that question with a question: What part of "never" don't you understand?

Ok guys. Your turn. Maybe I should make this a meme. You may choose either this post or the last one and post your own lists.

Mark said...

Yes Tug, it was difficult to admit that I listen to NPR on Saturdays. Forgive me.
And by the way, Narcissism is a requirement to listing 101 things about yourself. It implies that you think other people actually care.

rich bachelor said...

Just wondering what got you going on this theme.

Mark said...

I have seen other blogs where this meme was making the rounds, Bachelor.
Since this is the weekend and I no longer post serious subjects on weekends because if low readership, I decided to see if I could come up with 101 things about me. It is easier than I had omagined!

Mark said...

I couldn't resist explaining this one: 96) I turned down the lead role in my elementary schools production of "Little Black Sambo"

This was obviously before that story became politically incorrect. I didn't turn the role down out of respect for black people. I didn't know any at the time. I turned it down because it would have required me to remove my clothes on stage and I was much too shy to do that. In my stead, the role was played by my good friend, Alan Walker,(he had to strip down to a pair of shorts.) who later became the mile run record holder for Wichita State University and just barely missed qualifying for the Olympic games. And to think, when we were kids I don't remember him being that fast.

Mark said...

I did eventually play the lead role in an Easter play. I played the Easter Bunny, to rave reviews.

Francis Lynn said...

WHAT??!! Easter Bunny?? In a public school??!! The ACLU should throw the book at ya. We don't need the icy-cold water splash of introspection right now. If someone wants know 101 things about me, they gotta get past the first date. ;)

Mary said...

I admire your candor, Mark. :)

A.T. said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Etchen said...

Actually I think #46 needs a post all of its own. *smile*

Toad734 said...

You can't just say "I caught a burglar in my house" and "I caught the guy who stole my wife’s car" without elaborating.

Mark said...

Etchen, see #, as far as #'s 99 and 100, I think they're both self explanatory, I really caught a burglar and a car thief. one went to jail, i don't know if the other one did.

tugboatcapn said...

Does #45 explain #21?
Or #65?

Mark said...

No, Tug. the explanation of #45 is not included here. Suffice it to say that a woman was involved.