Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Where is Dean Martin When We Need Him?

The other night I watched the celebrity roast of Pamela Anderson on the cable channel, Comedy Central. Or I should say, I watched part of it.

I thought it would be funny.

It wasn't.

I thought I would see something like the famous celebrity roasts of Dean Martin. His shows were delightful and funny. To this day I can remember some of Red Button's hilarious "never got a dinner" lines. I thought I would see some comedians and other celebrities stand up and playfully tease Ms. Anderson, and then Pamela would get her turn to tease them back.

Just like Dean's famous guests.

What I saw instead, was the most obscene, filthy exhibition of depravity I have ever seen on television. I have seen pornography that was less offensive.

Don't get me wrong. It's not like I'm not used to seeing such perversion. I used to be married to a stripper. I am a recovering porn addict. Not very much shocks me.

But this show did. Don't take my word for it. Comedy Central, as is their way, will no doubt air it again and again and again, ad nauseum, so you will get a chance to see for yourself. But I will offer you this caveat:

If obscenity and perversion offends you, don't watch it. Consider yourself warned.

Let me see if I can recall enough to give you an idea what I am talking about.

There were continual references to the infamous sex video of Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee that was supposedly "accidentally" released to the public via internet. There were what seemed to be hundreds of references to the size of both Tommy Lee's and Pamela's genitalia. There were references to Pamela's Breast implants. There were nude pictures of Pamela Anderson broadcast, although they were mercifully blurred in strategic places by the otherwise non-existent censor. Oh God, I don't remember what all else went on there, mercifully. I turned the channel before I had seen all of it.

The other guests weren't spared the depraved barbs from the various comedians, either. Courtney Love, the widow of Kurt Colbain, was attacked mercilessly by the comedians about her addictions to drugs, alcohol, and sex. One comedian actually made reference to the current state of her dead husband. Absolutely appalling, in my opinion. I don't have any respect or love for Courtney love, mind you, but that disrespect went way too far over the line. Even for her.

Later, she responded to another insult about her "sluttiness" by leaning back in her chair and spreading her legs wide in front of the national audience. It was also blurred, so apparently she wasn't wearing anything under her skirt. Thank God the network censor managed to catch that one, too.

By the way, Courtney groggily announced she had been "clean and sober" for an entire year. Apparently, she fell off the wagon just for that night. Or so it appeared.

I don't know. Maybe your humble friend and uneducated blogger is becoming an old fuddy-duddy in his old age, but I kind of think just about anyone would have been offended by this disgraceful event.

Where, O where is Dean Martin when you need him?

Alas, Dino is dead, but surely turning over in his grave.


MadMustard said...

I haven't seen it but I am not surprised. Most television is not any good anymore, it's just tastless. It's sad when the commercials are more entertaining than the programming. Put me in that fuddy-duddy category too.

Francis Lynn said...

Pamela Anderson & Courtney Love - yeah, really classy chicks. Not. It is no longer comedy that drives those who think they are funny. It is foulness & shock value. Comedpornography maybe would describe it. The only taste these people have are in their mouths. The only "class" in them are the last 3 letters.

You reminded me. I have a bootleg tape of a private Friar's Club roast of Don Rickles in '68. The off color jokes of Rickles, Johnny Carson, Jackie Vernon & others & the foul mouth of Ed Sullivan, yes Ed, are priceless. It's reel-to-reel tape though. I need to get it copied somehow to CD.

Poison Pero said...

Quick tip: Watch TV with the MUTE BUTTON fully depressed.

There are some wonderful visuals on the tube, but very little of worth on the audio side.

Fitch said...

I agree with madmustard. I am not surprised. And Francis is correct about comedpornography. The mainstreaming of porn is apalling. Guess that makes me a fuddy duddy too.

Lores Rizkalla said...

i didn't see it and thankful for it. as a woman, i am just as repulsed by the supposed women's advocates who say nothing about the degradation that accompanies such perversion.

if being disgusted by foul, tasteless and disrespectful expressions of "humor" place you in the 'fuddy duddy' category, i gladly stand with you.

tugboatcapn said...

I had no idea that the Pamela Anderslut Roast would be that good, Mark!
I can hardly wait to see it now!
Courtney Love is one of my absolute favorite celebrities! (Even if she DID have Kurt killed.)
I am programming the Tivo right now with my right hand while I type with my left...

Lone Ranger said...

I saw about 10 seconds of it while channel surfing. I quickly moved on when I realized what it was. That was typical Friar's Club fare. The Dean Martin roasts were super-sanitized for TV. When given the chance to take the high road or low road, the Hollywood crowd ill always choose the latter.