Friday, April 10, 2009

New Names

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." ~ George Bernard Shaw

I got these from The Endive, a Conservative comedy website. The Endive is a web site created to be the antithesis of the Onion, which is a Liberal comedy website. My own edits are in color.

The Obama administration has been hard at work renaming many of the improperly named things we took for granted during the Bush administration. Here’s a handy guide to help you understand what everybody’s talking about these days:

The War on Terror is now
The Overseas Contingency Operation

Terrorist Attacks are now
Human-Caused Tragedies

Drug Dealers are now
Alternative Medication Providers

Enemy Troops are now
Improperly Oriented Gunmen

Dead people are now
Subterranean Contingency Humans

Kidnappers are now
Man-made Human Relocation Disaster Forces

Serial Killers are now
Repetitive Life-Removal Technicians

PONZI Schemers are now
Democrat Congressional Representatives

Illegal Immigrants are now
Misplaced Alternative American Nationals

Those who practice Bestiality are now
Alternative Animal Usage Inflictors

Death Row Inmates are now
The Appeal Generation Task Force

Terrorists are now know as
Moderate Head Removal Technicians

Retarded People are now know as
The Obama Bowling Force

18 comments:

Krystal said...

LOL!

Susannah said...

Laughing w/ Krystal! Very clever!

Trader Rick said...

POTUS is now:

NATIONALITY-CHALLENGED WEALTH REDISTRIBUTION MULTICULTURAL RECTUM HOLLOW.

Jim said...

Come on Rick, you can be nastier than that. Come on, get REALLY disgusting. You can do it. I know you can.

Jim said...

By the way Rick, will you be tea bagging on Wednesday?

Mark said...

Yeah Rick, get nastier. I know Obama deserves it.

How about "Marxist America Hater"? That's accurate.

Jim said...

Well "Marxist America Hater" isn't nasty, just profoundly stupid.

Mark said...

Jim would be "Mentally challenged blind Obama worshiper"

Jim said...

I would be if my IQ didn't say otherwise, if my eyesight weren't corrected to 20/20, and if I in fact did worship Obama. I don't. It's a false meme.

Obama wasn't my first choice. He's done some things I'm not crazy about and not done some some things that I hoped he would. But he's done a lot of things I do like. He's not perfect, but he's much better than the alternative. And if he's got you all peeing in your pants, he's probably doing most things right.

And he was elected by a strong majority of voters. So we'll just have to see what happens and both of us can vote for someone else in 2012 if we think someone will do better.

Most Rev. Gregori said...

How about this for Obama:

"Feminized Ball-less Wonder"

Mark said...

Jim Bloviates, "he was elected by a strong majority of voters."

Yes he was. Voters who didn't know anything about him or his policies, and now, many of them are now asking themselves why they voted for this idiot.

But not you, Jim. You are still allowing yourself to be led around by the nose by this lying, Marxist, weak-spined appeasing, narcissist.

And you say your eyesight is 20-20. Not on matters of ideology, buddy.

And your continual defense of this traitorous anti-American Terrorist lover despite the plethora of evidence that he is completely incompetent, if not just plain evil, proves your slobbering love affair and worship of him.

Susannah said...

Mark said "if not just plain evil..."

One of the smartest, most insigtful, most intuitive people I know (& one of my dearest friends) says Obama is The One "with a forked tongue & a black heart."

And she's serious. And I think she's right.

How's that for a name?

Jim said...

many of them are now asking themselves why they voted for this idiot. This is proven false by an approval rating substantially higher than his electoral victory.

I don't think there is anything Obama could do that would scare me as much as the rhetoric coming from you and yours. To realize there are "citizens" of this country who clearly don't believe in democracy, clearly hate America, clearly hate a majority of American voters, clearly dishonor their citizenship, is really hard to stomach.

Mike's America said...

If the Dems don't even have a sensible idea on what to call this stuff it's no wonder they don't have a plan on how to deal with it.

So far, Obama's pretty much kept the Bush program in place after campaigning against it.

One difference is that Obie is now negotiating with the Somali pirates, or as he would say "the makers of a man caused disaster."

Let's hope it doesn't take 444 days to resolve the current hostage crisis like it did the last time a Carter was in the White House.

Mark said...

Re: "To realize there are "citizens" of this country who clearly don't believe in democracy, clearly hate America, clearly hate a majority of American voters, clearly dishonor their citizenship"

I know the feeling. They are called Democrats.

Jim said...

Yep, uh huh.

Jim said...

Mark, apparently Obama did just fine since you pin the whole thing on him. The hostage is safe and three of the four pirates are dead.

Most Rev. Gregori said...

"To realize there are "citizens" of this country who clearly don't believe in democracy, clearly hate America, clearly hate a majority of American voters, clearly dishonor their citizenship, is really hard to stomach."

Yes Jim, and they are all Democrat liberal lefties.