Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Trying To Make Up. Really

"Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains." ~ Attributed to many, including Winston Churchill

A former high school classmate of mine posted the following on Facebook this morning. He said he received it in an e-mail from a friend of his who lives in Grosse Pointe, Michigan:

My neighbor is a progressive Marxist of sorts (gung-ho for Socialized Medicine, "All guns should be banned", distribution of Wealth from the Working People to those who do not want to work, etc.).

So this spring I put this sign up in my yard after one of his Anti-Gun rants at a neighborhood party:

Click to enlarge

My sign wasn't up more than an hour before he called the police and wanted them to make me take down the sign. The officer politely informed him that it was not their job to take such action without a court order and that my neighbor had to file a complaint first, which would be reviewed by the city attorney.

If there was a violation, a judge would issue a court order to be served on the offending party (me) to "remove the sign” within seven days.

Several weeks after my neighbor filed the complaint, he was informed that the sign was legal and there was nothing for the city to do.

I then tried to smooth things over by inviting him to go shooting with me and my friends but that seemed to anger him.

I then asked him if he wanted to go to a Tea Party Rally, but, again he declined my outreach efforts to bring about a better understanding between opposing political ideologies.

I could ask him if he wants to go deer hunting, you know, just a bunch of guys running through the woods chasing Bambi, then sitting around the campfire roasting marshmallows and singing our favorite patriotic & country songs. But, he declined because he hates the Killing of animals...except those in the Super Market Meat Department.

He also said that he doesn't like to leave to go anywhere during the week; because he will miss OPRAH!!!

I am at a loss as to how to reconcile our relationship and any suggestions would be welcome!


Trader Rick said...

Are those Azaleas? Beautiful!!

Jim said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jim said...

"I am at a loss as to how to reconcile our relationship and any suggestions would be welcome!"

Maybe start by not being an asshole. :-)

Mark said...

I can't disagree with that, Jim. Obviously the writer was being sarcastic.

Trader Rick said...

This post has not been removed by the author.

ELAshley said...

Tell him you're going vegetarian because you can't 'stomach' the end result of animal cruelty. You saw a report on TV and it sickened you.

Ask him to join you in a protest against the cruel treatment of livestock in the commercial meat industry. The clipping of chickens beaks, and the misery fraught lives of 'meatstock,' etc. Ask him to sign a petition with you.

Tell him he was right about hunting and such, that animals have rights too.

When he balks at giving up his own taste for grocery store meat, tell him you knew there was a conservative somewhere deep down inside him, and say,

"See? I knew we had something in common! Let's go hunting the way God intended it!"

Jim said...

By the way, I LOVE azaleas, too! Always reminds me of the 12th at Augusta.

Joe said...

Shoot him? Nah...now that I think about it, that's probably not the right way.