Beast Is A Democrat

"Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side." ~ Anonymous

A frequent commenter to my place here, and progressively moderate Liberal, Sheila, posed an interesting question to me on a previous post:

"What party affiliation is Beast?"

I laughed and, quite naturally, Immediately typed out "Beast is a proud Conservative Republican."

But later in the day, while driving, it suddenly occurred to me that I was wrong. To my chagrin, I have determined that Beast Is most definitely a Democrat! Let's look at the evidence, shall we?

First of all, Beast relies completely on the governing entity, me, for his sustenance. He receives his food, shelter, and medical care free. And appears quite satisfied with this arrangement. He does not have to work to enjoy the privileges of full citizenship, nor does he pursue gainful employment. So, he is obviously a proponent of the welfare state. Just like a Democrat.

When on walks, he constantly strains and pulls at the leash, especially, when a car is coming, he seems to want to put himself directly into it's path, indicating he prefers to go his own way, in spite of the fact that his actions may lead him into danger. That means he protests against the very thing that keeps him alive and safe. Just like a Democrat.

He puts complete trust in people who he doesn't know, who appear to be friendly, but who's intentions are unknown. Just like a Democrat.

When threatened, or even under an outright attack, he straightens out his curly little tail, and, tucking it firmly between his back legs, scurries for cover under the nearest chair or desk. From there he looks up at his antagonizer and whimpers. He never, under any circumstances, ever attacks back. Just like a Democrat.

When there are strangers just outside our door, he barks, but if we open the door, and allow the stranger in, he instantly becomes their best friend. He never bites them. Just like a Democrat.

He sits at my feet while I am eating the food that was provided by my hard work, hoping that I will toss him a crumb here and there. And if I don't give him some of what I earned with my hard earned money, he sulks. Just like a Democrat.

Occasionally, A van full of inmates from the local jail stops along the street here and they get out and start weed whacking, or picking up garbage, and other kinds of street maintenance, under supervision of the ever vigilant guard. Beast accepts these felons as friends, caring not what their offense might have been. If it were up to him, he would let them into our home and provide them with free care. Just like a Democrat.

Yes, my friends, if there is such a thing as the perfect Democrat, Beast certainly fits that profile.